Love to be mommy (sometimes)

I really love being a mommy most of the time.  I say most of the time because my 6yr old Raegan has been a tough child.  She is stubborn and strong willed and emotional.  All of these things make me know she is going to be and awesome adult but as a mother dealing with a child like this it is really hard!  Take this morning for instance.  My alarm goes off at 7am and I go in to wake her up.  Meanwhile Ruby is rolling around sucking on her hands wanting to nurse.  So I go into Raegan's room and say, "hey baby, its time to wake up."  I get her an outfit to wear and lay it on her bed and tell her to get dressed while I nurse Ruby.  At 6yrs old I don't think it is to much to ask for her to get herself up and dressed.  Well apparently I'm wrong!  Because instead of getting dressed while I'm nursing the baby she is in her room screaming and yelling and whining about how she "can't" get up and she "can't" get dressed.  So I say, "If you aren't dressed by the time I'm done nursing the baby you will have 1 screen time taken away".

Let me digress and tell you about screen time.  Raegan is a TV junkie.  She has been her whole little life.  And while I realise that is my fault I also plan on fixing it before its to late and I end up with a loser, fat, TV kid.  So I have changed the rules and we now get only 2 hours of screen time a day.  That can be used for 4 half hour shows, 1 movie, computer time or a mix match of computer and TV.  She hates this and has been bucking the system every day but in a way this makes me know that I am doing the right thing.  Because if it is that traumatic to her to only have 2 hours of screen time a day then there was a problem.  Being that she is 6yrs old she looks at her 2 hours as 4 shows.  Even if that is not how she uses it, her brain translates it that way.

So back to this morning.   When I say to her that she will have screen time taken away if she is not dressed by the time I'm done, she starts wailing!  Stomping and crying and throwing herself on her bed.  The works!  I then say, " You now have 1 screen time taken away for your behavior.  Please get dressed and stop screaming or more will be taken away."  At this point silence for 10min.  I'm crossing my fingers as I finish nursing Ruby that Raegan has gotten dressed.   But oh no!  When I go into her room she is just sitting on her bed with her arms crossed, face red from crying and in her panties only.  Inside I scream!  Outwardly I say calmly, "Raegan you now have 2 screen times taken away. 1 for your behavior and 1 for not doing what I asked of you.  Do you remember what I asked you to do?"  She starts screaming and throws herself to the floor.  I calmly repeat, "Do you remember what I asked of you?"  "YES!!", she screams.  "What did I ask?", I say.  And then add, "please lower your voice and speak to me kindly as I am speaking to you".  "TO GET DRESSED!  BUT I WANT MY SCREEN TIME BACK!!!", she screams at me.  All the while not getting dressed and continuing to throw herself around the floor.  I then say to her, "Mommy is loosing her patience, you need to stop screaming and stand up and get dressed right now!"  At this point she can only focus on her lost screen time.  So I say, "If you straighten up your behavior right now and turn this morning around by not yelling anymore and getting dressed you may be able to earn back your screen time 1 at a time."  She stops screaming but stands there looking at me.  I say, "Can you get dressed please?"  She begins to put her pants on.  But this then turns into a big ordeal because she is convinced she just does not like how they feel.  So the screaming ensues.  I say to her 3 times to go ahead and take the pants off and I will give her another pair.  But does she hear me?  I don't know!  All I do know is that she continues to flail around on the floor screaming about the pants.  So I say, "1....2.....3"  Slowly of course giving her time in between each number to respond.  But still no response just screaming and flailing. Then I say, "Your will no longer be able to earn back your screen time today because of your attitude and behavior."   Well this gets her attention.  Not the desired effect, because the screaming goes up a pitch if that is at all possible.  However, she at least heard me.
Eventually, through all of the tears and screams and kicks and flails, her clothes somehow make it onto her little body and we are on our way to the dinning room for breakfast.  She chooses to have toast with Nutella on it.  This is a favorite of hers.  I offer to read her a book while she eats.  I'm hoping that it will change the mood and get her mind off of the lost screen time and the previous disaster.  Reading to her works and I only have to remind her to eat about 10 times instead of 50. 
I am not at all looking forward to her return from school.  She will ask for her screen time and I will be forced to stick to my guns and only give her 1hr or 2 shows as she puts it.  I pray that the battle of wills won't be as bad as I anticipate. 
I know that later in life this strong willed child will go far.  She has so much potential and vivacity.  But being the parent to her and trying it teach her how to rain in the emotions and use her powers for good is SO hard!  Gosh I love this kid and I love being her mommy but it just might kill me LOL!  And now I'm starting all over with Ruby.  I hope its a little smoother with her.  Or is that asking to much?

I don't like no school days

Raegan is off school today for MLK day and she is going bazerk in the house.  It cold out so I don't really want to go outside but I think I am going to have to be creative and find something for her to do.  Last week we had 2 snow delays and because she is morning kindergarten she had no school.  The snow days were Wed. and Thurs.  and she drove me nuts both days.  She just has so much energy.  And the kid never stops talking, never.  She is such a drama queen.  The child sings and dances and acts and talks the Entire day.  Tommy says she gets it from me, but there is no way that I am so over the top.  When she was a newborn I read somewhere that it was good for a baby's development to talk and sing to them a lot.  Well I did and now I'm being punished because now that's how she is all the time :) 
After the two snow days last week she had school one day and that was Friday and then the weekend, the dreaded weekend.  I remember before kids I used to look forward to the weekend.  Now its the hell between school days that I have to try and do everything I usually do around the house just now I have to do it while tripping over a needy 6yr old.  And now its MLK day.  To top it all off, tomorrow is in service day and the kids are out of school again.  I swear the school is trying to punish me.  I know it must sound like I don't enjoy Raegan.  That really is not it at all.  I love her to death and think she is an amazing little girl.  But she is very smart and has tons and tons of energy and without school she is like a tightly wound spring.  So I really don't like no school days!  In a total of 7 days she will have gone to school 1 of those days, so you can only imagine how wound up she is. 
To top it all off I still feel like crud.  This cold/flu thing is really kicking my butt.  I'm up all through the night blowing my nose and coughing.  Then it feels like as soon as I fall asleep comfortably the baby wakes up and needs me to nurse her.  I really love nursing though.  Nursing Ruby is such a fantastic experience.  I missed out on that with Raegan for a variety of reasons and still feel extreme sadness about it.  Missing out on nursing with Raegan makes being able to nurse Ruby all that much more special.  Holding her warm little body and snuggling her while she is being nourished from my body is so amazing.  Not to mention watching her grow and be healthy gives me such a sense of accomplishment.  And grow she is!  Ruby is 3mo old tomorrow and she is over 15lbs.  Such a big baby!  Raegan was so tiny.  She was probably around 15lbs at 6mo old.  Having such a big baby is a new experience in itself.  But I tell ya, I think I like it better.  Ruby is more solid and I'm not always worried about her being fragile.  That sense of security could also be because she is my second baby but her size plays a big role as well.  Ruby has really renewed my love of being a mom again.  She is an excellent baby and I am truly blessed for that.  It makes me a bit nostalgic knowing she will be my last as Tommy is scheduled for a vasectomy on Feb. 4th.  I think I'm more nervous for him than he is.

Thank goodness for my Girasol Felice wrap

Everyone in our house has a crappy cold.  We all have the snuffly, achy, throat hurty yuck.  But even while I feel like I have been run over by a truck the girls still need mommy, the dishes still need done and the laundry still needs washed.  This is where baby wearing comes in handy.  Ruby has been a bear the last couple of days because she isn't feeling very well.  So when she is fussy and things need done, I pop her in the wrap and I'm able to do almost everything I need to.  Today I went to the laundry mat.  I wrapped her in a kangaroo carry and did all the laundry with her like that.  My wrap works well for nursing.  While I can't nurse her in the wrap because I am nursing challenged, I wad it up on my lap and use it as a pillow.  It was fantastic!  She loves the wrap so much that she was immediately cozy with her little face on it.  I have got to learn to back wrap better.  Getting laundry out of a humongous front loader and into the dryer and then out of the dryer and folding it is a task when you are looking over the head of a baby.  Now let me clarify it is still easier than listening to her scream while I'm doing it.   
Last night we had some friends over for dinner.  It was so much fun.  I made homemade Pad Tia for dinner.  It tasted great!  I forgot the rice noodles in the hot water for to long though and it was more like Pad Mush but the flavor was fantastic.  We played some games dinner and Felice was a life saver.  I was able to sooth a fussy baby and play games with my friends at the same time.  Yeah, I'm a bit obsessed with this wrap.  But it truly makes my life so much easier.  And Ruby loves it to.  She will actually cry if I have to adjust it because she thinks I'm going to put her down.  Its really cute.  As soon as I re tie it she stops crying.
Tommy is going to have a fit though if I keep buying wraps.  So I have decided to pick three and sell the rest.  Boo.   But I guess I'll try and be a good wife and make my hubby happy since he totally supports me on lots of things.  Plus I'm pretty hormonal right now since I'm post partum and may feel a bit more "in need" of more wraps than really necessary.  But if you ask some of the sweet mama's I have met on the baby wearing sites with monstrous stashes they would beg to differ.  But my new goal right now is to get my pay pal zeroed out.  Why do they give me credit, ahhhh, it makes it so hard to resist all the pretty wraps. 
So in a prior post I talked about my lovely lady wrap Marigold.  Well I traded her tonight for a Girasol Big Sur.  I hope I love it and I don't get sad about loosing Mari.  I'm excited and nervous at the same time.  I will definitely let you all know how the new wrap is when I get it.

Mommy your to big and to old

Today I desided to get little Ruby one of those bumbo seats.  You know the ones, big giant rubber seat that you sit a baby in.  They are so weird and I said I wasn't going  to be one of those moms that puts their baby in a bumbo seat.  Yeah, um well, I am.  I gave in, I sold out.  I got a bumbo.  And do you know... it is awesome!  I even got the little tray that you put on it for toys and stuff.  Wow, how did I ever mother Raegan as a baby with out this.  There are so many things that I wish I had known about or that did not exist with Raegan that I get to try with Ruby.  But its funny because I like to think of myself as a more natural style mama until I try something like this and then Im hooked.  I guess there is nothing natural about a giant rubber seat that you put baby in for a few months then get rid of. 
And where to I go to get said bumbo seat?  At one of the most un natural places on the planet, Wal-mart.  Go ahead, say it, bad mommy, bad.  I packed up the girls and headed out.  At least my Toyota Corrolla is a pretty environmentally friendly car, rolling in at 30 mpg.  Oh yeah! Makin' up for at least a little!  Anyway, I packed up the girls and off to Wally World we go.  When we got out of the car I grabbed a cart and Raegan starts in with, "I wanna ride in the cart".  I said, "No, your to big", and the whine fest was on.  So instead of get mad I join in.  "I wanna ride in the cart", I whine.  "I don't wanna walk, nooooo faaaiiirrr" I protest!  And Raegan starts cracking up!  She sputters, "Mommy, your to old"!  So I crack up and pretend cry saying, "Boo hoo, Raegan says I'm to old"!  Then she says, "Well your not to old your to big"!  So we are laughing  so hard at this point and people are staring but I don't care.  And then she says, "Mommy, your to big and to old"!  Aww geez!  Im laughing but I'm realizing she's right.  I am to big and to old!  No more riding in carts for me. Crap!  Of course at this point my imagination runs away with me and I think that I should take a picture of my big, old butt in a wally world cart and post it on that web site called, People of Wal-mart.  And if you have never heard of or seen this site you MUST.  I will post a link to get you started.  Please beware, put your soda down before clicking the link because it will come out your nose.  Ok here it is! 
Now we are home and little Ruby is sitting in her big rubber chair chewing on her fingers, talking to her toys and mommy is happily sitting on the floor next to her blogging away, glad to have sold out to the bumbo and trying not to squirt soda out my nose looking at the pictures on People of Wal-mart site. 

Wanna be a baby wearer!

I just wanted to let anyone who read the last post and loved the carriers know of some awesome places to find excellent used carriers and wraps at great prices.  These are sites I use and are for the most part very user friendly and safe.  I highly recommend using pay pal to make purchases as well so that every thing and every one is kept accountable.
Baby center.com
The Baby wearer.com
Natural Mamas

Also any of the brand sites are great for new wraps and carriers but you will pay more :)

and lastly there are some other sites that are authorized dealers.  This is not a compete list but these are some very trusted places that have excellent feedback.
Granola babies
A piece of cloth
Pinkletink baby
Wear a baby

Please beware that there are some sites and people out there who are trying to take advantage of unknowing newbies in the baby wearing community, so please look for feedback before making a transaction at anytime.